People I know who have serious or chronic medical problems complain that they feel betrayed by their body. Their body has always been strong or beautiful or fertile, and then suddenly it's not and it betrays their vision and sense of themselves.
I've never felt strong or beautiful or fertile. I've never needed to play sports or wear small clothing sizes or bear children or perform fantastic feats of sexual prowess or walk long distances or lift heavy things or be energetic or any of that stuff. I've always been quite willing to cheerfully admit that my body is pretty much useless for anything except sloth, and I have no problem with that.
Similarly, I've never been a terribly indulgent person. I'm an introvert with low novelty-seeking. I don't need to travel the world or climb mountains or set world records. I'm happy alone with a good meal and a good book. My happy places are food and fandom, and food is the only one over which I have control. (Fandom is dependent on other people creating new stuff - whether it be canon or forum posts - whereas I can just go buy a slice of cake whenever I want.)
This bastard knew just where to get me where it would hurt the worst.
3 comments:
I never related to the body-betrayal thing either.
I think (not that it should matter) that you should complain as much and for as long as you like.
Careful, you might encourage me! :p
Currently I'm trying to externalize my thoughts so as not to obsess over every twinge of my esophagus. We'll see how long it lasts.
De-escalating is good. When it comes from someone else, it's insensitive minimizing. But when it comes from within, I think it's useful.
Post a Comment